Ode to Tools

Screw you, lover boy!
What you think I am?
A toy?

I don’t need your
baby blues
Or your sexy
sleeve tattoos
I can do bad on my own
So you just leave
This girl alone!

You done met your match with me
Cuz I been all you’ll ever be
I got this thing!
Young man? Ya hear?
So buy yourself another beer.

What’s that you say?
I sure look good?
To a tool like you-
I’d think I would!

Yep, I’m a bitch
Just like you say-
I’m the bad ass bitch
that got away!


This little ode goes out to all the Tools out there that will be celebrating today’s Hallmark Holiday by scouring the local venues looking for lonely women.

My contribution to Dylan’s First Line Friday on MLMM wherein the first line, “Screw you, lover boy” was supplied.

14 thoughts on “Ode to Tools

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