The first young comic of the evening was introduced, took center stage, grabbed the mic from the stand and opened her mouth to speak…
Instead, her vision blurred, her stomach cramped, her ears rang, and sweat began trickling down her scalp..
She was stuck, frozen, could not move, speak, nothing.
In effort to regain her composure, she closed her eyes, took a deep breath and opened her mouth once again.
What came out was nearer to a croak and sounded faintly reminiscent of the tin man,
“Oooooiiillll ccccaaaannnn”
And the audience, convinced they had just witnessed comedic genius, applauded madly…
Word Count: 100
Love this.
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So glad you did. Thanks for stopping by.
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Great! Now I wonder if it’s just stage fright, or if she’s had a stroke.
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I hadn’t planned anything so drastic, but you never know what happens after those 100 words…
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Comedy for some, tragedy for another. Cycle of life continues.
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Stage fright… been there once or twice myself. Great write.
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I didn’t want to use the words, I just wanted to show it.. So glad you got it. Thanks for stopping by.
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I’d’ve laughed – sounds hilarious 🙂 And hopefully that gave her the confidence to continue with her set.
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I’m thinking it did. Thanks for stopping by
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Even better if she then just walked off stage and that was the full act 🙂
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I still haven’t decided if she had stage fright or this was a very clever opener. But if it was her opener,, you have the answer.
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Ha ha – loved that last line! Great take on the photo prompt.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
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I’m so glad. Thanks for stopping in.
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She obviously has something, and at least she’s got that first appearance done. Second time it’s easier.
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I’d rather think it WAS comedic genius. I mean, it’s really, really funny if those words just popped into her head because she was frozen, and the audience seemed to think so too. I love this–made me laugh 🙂
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I’m just so happy everyone got it!! I was afraid the brevity of the piece might have lost the punch.. Thanks for stopping by.
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Oiiilll Caaaaaannnn; I’m going to try that when I next do stand up!! Made me chuckle!
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If you do please let me know how it works. I thought it was hysterical when I first thought about it.. Thanks for stopping in.
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Ha!
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it must be what they call beginner’s luck. then again, some comic make people laugh just by acting out. 🙂
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LOL! I’d love to see that.
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She inadvertently stumbled on something comically unique! Excellent.
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Glad you liked it Keith. It struck me as funny and I just thought I’d share the laugh..
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Dear Violet,
Welcome to Friday Fictioneers.
She might want to broaden her repertoire after tonight. Fun piece.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle for stopping by and hosting this wonderfully creative event.
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Nice..It just goes to show what suckers some people are for anything that’s labelled avante garde, experimental ,etc. Assuming she really was in the throes of an anxiety attack, she’ll have lots of trouble, from then on, trying to keep up.
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Not being an entertainer I went out on a limb with this.. I just thought the line was hysterical and would work.. Thanks for stopping in.
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Yes It worked out quite well. Hysterical is always quite an advantage
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Clever take and an inspired way to deal with stage fright!
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Thank you K for your visit and your comment. I am so thrilled I got my point across without telling anyone she had stage fright.
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Clever and extremely funny. I had a good chuckle with this one.
I hope she was able to regain her composure and keep them laughing.
Nicely done … have a great weekend.
Isadora 😎
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Thank you Isadora. Hope to see you here next week.. Enjoy the weekend.
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The mark of a great entertainer is being able to turn a fiasco into a triumph. Of course, there are some people who can just fall into the poop-wagon and come out smelling like a rose. Great story.
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Thank you so much. I really felt unsure of my ability to tell this one properly in so few words.
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Sometimes the best acts came out by accidents… wonder if she can do for another hundred times.
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I bet she’ll work it in where she can now that she knows it works.
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If she can think on her feet like that, maybe she should try improv! Definitely can empathize with her panic!
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So glad you liked the save.
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Welcome to Friday Fictioneers, Violet! That was a fun one!
By the way, it is really difficult for us to read other people’s comments… grey on lilac 😉
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Thank you Dale for stopping in. I am gonna try another theme I cannot darken the print on the comment boxes I’ve tried.
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Maybe you can just change the colour of the print without changing the whole theme!
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No. I would have to buy a plan to get to play with the CSS on that theme.. But I switched to another theme and I think it’s gonna be ok..
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Ahhh… bummer.
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I can identify with that. 🙂 A resourceful woman though.
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A great piece of flash fiction,
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Oh poor thing. Stage fright can be awful. All that rehearsal for nothing
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I felt for her. I’ve been in that position. A wonderful twist at the end and probably gave her a new act she could take into the future. Just shows that no-one knows what was going to be said so if you make a mistake just run with it.
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Thank you Irene! I was surprised to see how many entertainers we have in our ranks. I’m not one, but that line just struck me as funny.
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I would certainly have to be well-oiled to get up and speak to a crowd like that! Well done Violet. 🙂
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Nicely told story- grabbed my attention from the start- loved the ‘ oooohiiilll ‘bit, and clever link to the oilcans for her stage fright. Also great twist at the end.
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